I got sent a picture today in the group chat of a very ridiculous moment on one of the countless gals holidays I embarked on as a young 18 year old kiddo. I won’t tell you what the picture was ….. but all I’ll say is teeth and if you know, you know and if you’re that desperate to know, message me and I’ll happily retell the tale. If I tell on here my mum would probably murder me and the victim may somehow find me and try and sue me or something just as disastrous.
We spent a while reminiscing and retelling funny and of course, awfully embarrassing stories of times gone by (10 years ago) when we had no responsibilities and our measley wage was spent on shots of apple sours, Bacardi breezers, a new weekend outfit (every weekend) and of course the obligatory flight to maga that you booked about 11 months in advance and then paid off in monthly instalments.
Back in those days I had no idea what was in store for my future, probably getting those wild days out of the way, getting an ace job, meeting someone, settling down and then living life in harmony. Most of the gals have hit the jackpot. Babies galore, wonderful houses, careers, dogs, cats and they’ve all (well most of them) bagged them self hotties who we can laugh and spend time with as if they’ve been there all along.
I haven’t hit many of those life milestones that are forcibly ingrained into you by the whole world and his sister. At 25 I thought that was an issue, that I wasn’t “on track” but as the years tick by, I’ve realised that I’m perfectly on track for me and that’s all that matters. It hasn’t really (well not at all) worked out the way I envisioned, but I don’t feel hard done by, I feel blessed (gag) that my life has panned out this way.
Instead I’m living the life I always dreamed off and making memories to last a lifetime.
I feel happy that I have supportive parents who will listen to a dream that randomly pops into my head and encourage me to act on it (well mum will and then persuade dad). That they will do all they can to make sure I have the best life and help any way they can with that little bit of responsibility I left behind (my mortgage and flat). My mum doesn’t ask me every 14 minutes when I’ll meet someone and give her some more grandkids. Every day she reinforces to me that I am enough as a single entity and I couldn’t love her any more for that if I tried.
I’m lucky to have friends who check in on me, send me pictures and videos and accept I can’t be there for their important milestones, but know I would do anything to be there if I could. They ask when I’m coming home, because they love me and want to see me, but they also tell me they want me to stay so I can have the best time.
Then there’s the wonderful people I’ve met whilst being on this wild adventure. People who I’d usually never imagine would be “my sort of person”.
I’m learning and changing and challenging myself every single day.
I’m experiencing things I’ve dreamt of experiencing but haven’t acted on because of what was holding me back; my career, money and debt, my weight and the way I see myself and imagine others see me, letting people down and a whole bloody plethora of other reasons,
I’ve learnt that it’s not selfish to put yourself first for once.
The world keeps turning, you either take each opportunity by the bollocks and take a leap of faith or you don’t. I won’t tell you how to live your life because you’re you, but you know which option I’m taking.