I LOVE CHRISTMAS…. every sweet f’ing thing about it. One of my favourite things is making new traditions as the years go by and then sticking to them religiously, because if you don’t santa might not come ya know? Here’s a little run down of my Christmas traditions, which begs the question, why can’t it be christmas everyday?
1.Leaving buying a few present until the last minute. I’m talking the 23rd December or even Christmas Eve here, because there is just nothing like the stressful, excitement of last minute shopping, right? I only leave basic bitch things like chocolate and socks or suchlike, but I just love buying my last few bits with just days to spare – oh the drama!
2. Setting up the wrapping station. Picture the scene, I’m plonked on the floor in my festive pyjamas watching a festive film (love actually, Elf or The Holiday), surrounded by all the wrapping paper, tags, ribbons, embellishments and sparkle you could ever lay eyes on, drinking a port (obvs) ready to embark on the delightful wrapping task. I like to try and do it all at once (minus those few presents I haven’t bought yet!) but it makes me excited. However we all know the first 3 look ever so instagrammable and it all goes downhill from then on in, numb bum, numb leg, cellotape in every orifice, but who cares it’s mother f***ng Christmas!
3. Making Sausage rolls. I’m not going to lie, I cheat. I buy puff pastry, because it’s the best, FACT and who the blooming heck makes pastry, apart from Mez Bez. Then buy extra special sausages and add some cheese, because I love chese on everything, ok. The smell that fills the house is delightful and not sure you can beat the feeling out eating a sausage roll warm out of the oven…… unless you burn your tongue on it, which I of course always do.
4. Christmas Eve is probably one of my favourite days/nights of the year. I try to visit everyone I can and get into the festive spirit. After I’ve last-minute wrapped, made sausage rolls and danced around the kitchen to Christmas songs I like to get on it….. there is nothing better than heading down the pub late afternoon with your christmas jumper on and drinking with friends. The best thing is everyone is in such a good mood as they’ve finished work and are excited for Christmas. I always tell myself I’ll make sure I’m home at 11pm before santas comes, but that rarely happens, because my willpower is lacking in general, let alone at Christmas.
5. Wearing all of your new garms on christmas day. I channel my inner Joe Tribiani every Christmas day, know the scene I’m talking about? I pile it all up, scarves, hats, bag, perfume, mascara, bathing in new bubble bath. You know the drill. God forbid anyone to say they like something that you didn’t get bought for Christmas or you purchased especially for Christmas festivities. “Oh this, yeh I got it for Christmas hun”
6. Drinking wine and eating cheese at 10am, because its Christmas….. shame I can’t use that excuse in January, February, March etc.
7. The one and only Christmas Dinner – everything thinks theirs is the best, but our Christmas dinner, is, ok? I’ll talk you through it because I know you are all dying to hear about it!
Turkey, obvs with bacon on top, because that’s just bae
Pork Belly – yes, you heard right, succulent, crispy pork belly
Chipolatas – butchers ones because they are the best
Hairy Bikers Nut Roast – because it is delectable and made with the finest ingredients. Gruyère, nuts, sun-dried tomatoes and spinach (probs prefer it to the Turkey, not gonna lie)
Tom Kerridges Stuffing – made in a pudding basin, because that’s how us Hitter/Lewis/Butchers roll (that’s our surnames BTW). A slice is stuffing is all in need from my Christmas life
Perfect Roasties – Need I say more
Swede and Carrot Mash – My absolute fave, GIMME
Roasted Parsnips – Scuse me whilst I just salivate
Red Cabbage – This just sings of christmas
and of course I will eat a token sprout because it’s the season of goodwill
All rounded off with bread sauce, cranberry sauce and gravy, all the gravy.
Must add that everything must be made from scratch otherwise I will have a shit fit, including accompaniments, the end.
Have a very merry Christmas boos and let me know what traditions you’ve got? And do you agree with how perfect our Christmas dinner is?